Enduring to the End

Rosann Coulon joins us this week to share a devotional from her recently released book, 40 Days to God, My Father: Finding Shelter in the Heart of God on enduring to the end. A special thank you to Christian Focus Publications, Ltd. for allowing Rosann to share one of her devotions with us.

“He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you,
for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”
2 Corinthians 12:9 ESV

Rosann Shares:

“God never audibly said no to me. But on the day I turned forty years old, the hope that swelled in my heart to have children one day wouldn’t rise above the floor. Before that moment, I’d gripped expectation and pled with my whole heart for God to give me babies. As far back as I could remember I wanted five, but I resolved to settle for just one—it never happened. 

Chronic illness stole my child-bearing years, and although forty is not too old to conceive, I knew my window of opportunity had slammed shut. This realization shook me with grief. Throughout that day, even during a surprise birthday party orchestrated by my husband, one question burned in my mind: Why, God? 

Looking back on my fortieth birthday (over a decade ago)—the day I knew the Lord’s answer to my prayer for children was no—I latched onto God’s words to the Apostle Paul: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Cor. 12:9a). And I’ve clung to them ever since. 

Just like me, Paul received a no from God. Scripture describes Paul’s asking the Father three times for healing from a thorn in the flesh (vv. 7-8). Yet after pleading with God, the answer was no to his request. And the Lord didn’t say no because He was a mean ogre like the enemy might try to convince us. 

God said no because He wanted to give Paul something greater than physical healing. He desired to bestow humility upon the apostle and to give Himself— His grace, power, strength, and sufficiency. The Father wants (and promises) to give us the same gifts. 

Paul’s prayer for healing didn’t look like what he expected—and neither did mine. Paul’s thorn remained and my womb stayed empty. Yet just as the Father extended grace to overcome the pain Paul endured, He offered the same grace to me as I buried a dream laying on an ash pile of culminated losses from years of sickness. 

Perhaps you’re seeking healing in your life. Can I gently suggest that you let go of expectations on how healing should look—or feel? Yes, our Father is able, capable, and sometimes He will heal us by removing the pain. Yet, He may choose to heal by giving us Himself. Ultimately, the Lord is the greatest healing we can ever receive—and His grace is sufficient to see us through until He calls us home to glory. 

Prayer:

Dear Father, when the answers to my prayers for healing don’t look like what I expect, my heart grieves. Help me trust that Your grace is sufficient for whatever weakness, pain, or heartache I experience. Fill my heart with the comfort of Your presence, power, and strength to overcome my struggles. In Jesus’ name, Amen. “

**This devotion appears in 40 Days to God, My Father. Used by permission from Christian Focus Publications, Ltd.**

Meet Rosann:

Rosann Coulon is the author of the book 40 Days to God, My Father: Finding Shelter in the Heart of God. She has contributed articles to The Gospel Coalition, The Daily Grace Co., Core Christianity, and other publications. She is the founder of Leaving a Well Ministries whose mission is to share biblical hope with hurting hearts by providing Christ-centered resources. Rosann and her husband call North Carolina home. Visit her at www.leavingawell.com to receive free inspirational content. You can also connect with her at instagram.com/rosann_coulon. 

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