By: Tiffany Mickens – Tiffany shares her testimony of spiritual healing and faith as she battles her health.
Second Time Around
I look at these four walls and hear the white noise from the television that sits before me. All I can think of is how I failed again. I have failed as a mother, wife, and saint of God. I did not live up to my righteous walk. My children must think I am horrible, I have left them for the second time, especially the oldest one. He is eleven and I am sure he understands what is happening. My poor baby girl, just 13 days old, and her Mama is not available to comfort her. “Not available” are such harsh words. I often wondered if she cried when she did not hear my voice. We were bonding so well.
Hearing the cries of the other newborns down the hall was so unbearable. I could not comfort my newborn. She was at home, and I was here. A glimmer of peace came over me, knowing that my children were doing well at home, with their father. I wanted to be home with my family, but we were divided again. I prayed, but did I not do it in faith? Was my faith not enough to keep me from this place again? Did I not learn my lesson the first time? I took the medication as prescribed, but it did not work.
Healing and Faith
I had so many questions and one repeated scripture in my head 1 Peter 4:12-19 (KJV). I could not recite it verbatim, but I kept thinking and saying, “Don’t think it strange this fiery trial”. Unable to get past this part and I did not have access to my bible because I left it at home. Yet again another failure. I am full of sadness with tears in my eyes, but I guess I am coping better this time. I feel more guilt than sadness, but at least I was given a better room.
It is my birthday tomorrow, so of course I deserve this newly furnished room. Huge windows, a hotel-style bathroom, a tan mahogany leather couch, and a comfortable bed. Yes, a comfortable bed indeed. I deserve this bed because it is my birthday tomorrow. It is my birthday tomorrow and this is my second admission to the postpartum unit, for a diagnosis of post-partum hypertension, which resembles post-partum preeclampsia.
Faith and the Diagnosis
Post-partum hypertension is a rare medical condition that occurs when a woman has high blood pressure after giving birth. This rare medical condition can occur up to six weeks after delivery. If left untreated post-partum hypertension can lead to heart failure, stroke, organ damage, or even death.
I was nervous to see a blood pressure reading of 213/90. The doctors and nurses worked diligently all night to stabilize my blood pressure. Some were even shocked that I did not have any other symptoms, besides a headache. Intravenous Magnesium sulfate was not needed this time, because I had recently received treatment during the first admission. I was relieved to hear this from the doctor.
Finally, some good news during this medical ordeal. I cried uncontrollably, even after hearing this good news to only think of the worst possible outcome. Not wanting to feel scared anymore, therefore I shunned these negative thoughts, and in this moment of mental and spiritual defeat, I did what the Bible instructed me to do. I leaned on scripture James 5:13-16 (KJV), and I prayed. I contacted my Father to pray for me as well. After prayer, my faith still wavered, but I had enough in me to trust God.
Healed and Faith Restored
Morning came and all I could say was “Thank You, Jesus”. I have said this plenty of times in my life, but this was the I hope that you hear me loud in Heaven, “Thank You, Jesus”. I made it to the next day, and I was no longer in a medical crisis. My blood pressure was normalized, and I started to heal. The feelings of guilt and sadness dissipated as if I didn’t even experience those feelings, to begin with. I look back now and realize that I was already healed when I prayed to Jesus for the first time.
The prayer that I have been praying for years. Prayer for good health, healing, and strength for myself, my family, my friends, and those in the body of Christ. I believe that my prayers are in the vials according to Revelation 5:8-9 (KJV). I believe that God was reminding me that I would be healed, and this was just a trial. This is the reason for the repeated scripture 1 Peter 4:12-19 (KJV).
Everything I went through was not an accident; I had to go through this trial because it is in fact my testimony, and there was nothing strange about it. I hope that this testimony will help others during their trials and times of trouble as I am living a happy and healthy life, with Jesus. I must say it again “Thank you Jesus for my healing”.
Meet Tiffany
Tiffany resides in Georgia with her husband and four children. She is a licensed social worker/therapist but is currently taking a sabbatical from her career to raise her children at home. Bible study, creating art, game night, and family outings are just a few of the many activities she enjoys, partaking in with her family. In her free time, she loves to write poetry, and short stories, and create digital illustrations, pattern designs, and digital animations. Tiffany aspires to self-publish religious children’s books in the future to amplify the scripture Proverbs 22:6. You can find and follow Tiffany on IG @tiffart73.
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