When we compare ourselves to others, we forget the act of gratitude. Have you ever tried to keep up with someone? Not just a mom running after her toddler but competing with someone. You know what I mean – buy a new car because they have a new car, buy a new outfit from a designer because they have a new outfit from the same designer. Do you ever try to keep up with the Joneses? What happens when you are focused on what others have, but forget to acknowledge and give thanks for what you do have?
Is your focus on material things and are your motives fueled by envy and greed? Or is your focus on God and His goodness, and the blessings He has bestowed upon you?
Comparison Game Kills Gratitude
It’s easy to get caught up in the comparison game. You know where you start looking at your ___ (car, house, marriage, kids, clothes, job, family… fill in the blank), and compare that to someone else’s (blank). Social media is a good way of doing it, it’s easy to see someone’s best and compare it to your worst, those feelings of being inadequate, vulnerable, insecure, not worthy, or not good enough start to fester and bubble to the surface.
I get it, I’ve been there. I’ve looked at someone’s pictures and thought how perfect they had it.
My Toes Are Starting to Hurt
However, the most humbling thing happened when someone a few years back looked at me and said, “I know you are upset with what’s going on in your life, but I envy what you have. I’d take your life in a heartbeat.” Ouch. My toes weren’t just being danced on, that was a hard stomp.
The Grass is Greener
I heard a saying once that I have adopted, “The grass is only greener where you water it.” That nugget is so true. Your marriage is “green” when you put effort, love languages, good communication, etc into it, but people don’t want to do the work. They want the easy way and it’s easier just to look at what someone else has and want that.
Don’t love your house, or think you need a bigger one? Invest in your current situation and see what green grass grows. Update the kitchen, paint the walls, and give the landscaping a facelift. It’s easy to want all these things but we have to remember that God is good.
Leah & Rachel
There are several examples of comparison and envy in the Bible. One of the most notorious duos, Leah and Rachel – two sisters in the Old Testament – played a game of envious comparison and competition. These sisters shared a husband, Jacob.
Jacob loved Rachel and Leah wasn’t his preferred wife. Rachel became jealous of her sister’s ability to have children with Jacob (Genesis 30:1) She was even willing to give her maid Bilhah, for Jacob to have children with. (Genesis 30:3-8). Then as if that wasn’t enough, Leah stopped having children and proceeded to give her servant, Zilpah, to Jacob too. (Genesis 30:9-13) God heard Rachel’s prayers and she became pregnant (Genesis 30:23) naming her son Joseph. All the while Jacob had twelve sons and one daughter and at least four wives because two sisters competed to outdo the other.
Sisterly Competition
They were competing with each other to see who could have more sons for Jacob. Leah thought if she could have more sons, it would make Jacob love her. Then Rachel was jealous that her sister was able to become pregnant and she wasn’t, but she eventually did have two sons.
Never doubt that you are enough, you are loved, and you are cherished and seen. Hold tight to these promises from Christ. Don’t let the comparison game get you down. At times like that, it’s important to remember that God created You in His image and that He doesn’t make mistakes.
Prayer
Lord search my heart, if there are weeds of envy and jealousy in my heart please pluck those. Help me to change and be grateful for my circumstances, making the most of the blessings we have been given. Thank you, Lord. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
Reflection
- What are you trying to compete with someone over?
- How can you celebrate with them, instead of competing?
- Write out a prayer to ask God to help you to be grateful for what you do have.
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Releasing to God Series
The countdown for the new series is a week away. Releasing to God series will start the first week of June. I hope that you will join us.
